Am I supposed to be flattered because all of a sudden you just now notice that I am somewhat attractive? Did you really just ask a mutual acquaintance if I was still married? Really? (Cue Seth and Amy) Guess what buddy, here’s the deal.
I’ve been with the same man since 1986. Do the math that is over a quarter century. We’ve been married for going on 24 of those years. I was skinny and cute and sexy as hell when he met me as a young co-ed in college. And he fell in love with me. Not because I was thin but because he saw me for me and loved me for it. We’ve had two beautiful children together and I’ve been every number on the scale between 140 and 210 pounds in the years since our wedding day. And he still loves me and thinks I’m sexy.
He’s sat with me in the hospital after surgeries and births and seen me and my body at my worst. And he still loves me. He’s heard me fart, barf and smelled the aftermath of a bad dookie. And he still loves me.
He’s started walking, running and biking with me so we can grow old together and still be active and healthy. We’re in this together; for better or worse, through sickness and health, yada, yada, vows taken before God and all that stuff.
You on the other hand are a marginal acquaintance or maybe even a person I know professionally and you just now decided that I am worth noticing because I’ve lost some weight and carry myself differently. You think I should be flattered because you noticed me? Nope, doesn’t work that way. How many other worthwhile, smart, funny, beautiful women are you ignoring every day because they don’t fit your idea of being worthy of your notice? I’m not even going to say thank you for the “compliment” (and if you really knew me you’d know that I LOVE to say thank you!) because what you did was at best a back-handed compliment and in my opinion it was a rude-ass slap in the face. I’ve always been smart. I’ve always been funny. I’ve always had these cheekbones. But YOU couldn’t see them because YOU weren’t paying attention, NOT because they were hidden beneath a layer of fat.