I keep putting off writing this post. I took pictures of my fat self in an almost finished swimsuit in February in Illinois. Not a good thing to be looking at in all honesty. But to be honest, maybe it is exactly what I SHOULD be looking at right now. It isn’t pretty, but it is the truth.

One of the benefits and the draw backs of sewing your own clothes is that you can (and should!) make them to fit your body perfectly. That’s why we do this right? But (there’s always a but, or in my case a BUTT!) because we are paying attention to measurements and final fit, we may overlook the bigger picture. After a year of sewing and photographing myself in my finished garments I have to acknowledge that I’m not always liking what I am seeing. I don’t stress a lot about my size, it’s all just a number right? I usually go by what feels right. When I feel like my clothes aren’t fitting the way I like or I can’t physically do what I want to do, I start moving more and drinking eating less.

I’ve been thinking about writing a post about body image for a while now but didn’t know where to go with it. I know I’m overweight and I also know that my mental image of my body is quite different from reality. I still “see” myself as the tall size 6/8 young thing that I was in my 20s. But back then I didn’t like myself, I wanted bigger boobs and a flatter stomach (some things never change). Now I look at myself in the mirror, usually when naked after showering, and I don’t mind what I see. It isn’t until I put on clothes that don’t fit the way I’d like or look the way I think they should that I have a problem with my body image. I have breasts that fed 2 babies and were never exactly perky so I accept them for what they are now. I have a stomach that is way bigger than I’d like but without clothes to restrict it it is round and voluptuous and blends in well with the hips and thighs that support it. I don’t like the dimples that my hips and thighs are now sporting but my calves and ankles are still thin and shapely. For the most part my body is still strong. I can lift and carry things with almost the same strength I always could. I’m not as flexible as I once was but I’m still more flexibly than a lot of people my age and size.  I’ve never been a runner or had a lot of cardiovascular endurance so nothing has changed there. Would I like to be more fit and slimmer? For sure!

It is hard for me to make the time to do what I need to do to get the body I want to have. I don’t like to cook even though I know what kinds of foods I should be eating. At the end of the day I’d just rather grab something to fill up my stomach so I can go back to doing the things I really enjoy. I need to stop making excuses about exercising. When I make the time to do it, I love it. I really do. I love how in control and strong it makes me feel. I just need to get over the inertia of laziness that I tend to fall into. Even if I just made time for one yoga class and one aqua-fit class a week plus took the time to walk the dogs a couple days a week I’d see an improvement. Nike was on to something when they made “Just Do It” their slogan.

Anyway, enough words. I made my first swimsuit.

I was going to save the scary picture for last but let’s just get it over with shall we? This is just a basic tank made using the pattern and instructions in the Kwik Sew Swim & Action Wear book. I did color block it by cutting the pattern at the waist line and adding 1/4” seam allowances. It is also fully lined. I really like this striped fabric. The selvage edge says © Gap Inc. and it is a really nice weight and finish. If I were to do the half-and-half suit again I would probably drop the waist a couple inches to elongate the torso instead of cutting it in half. But then I run the risk of putting a horizontal line right across the widest part of my body. Maybe moving the line up to an empire level just under the bust is a better idea. I just think I’m already too short waisted and don’t want to accentuate that either. Hmmmmm.

Here’s an even scarier view from the back. I ran out of elastic before I could finish the leg openings. This is where I think lowering the waist line would look better and make my butt look less enormous. Most of my RTW suits have a much higher back on them and I think the next suit I make will too. I like the support a higher back gives and is more flattering overall.

After my final fitting I decided that I wanted some straps across the back to help keep the shoulder strap from falling off. Just look at those sad slopey shoulders in that photo! I wrapped a long piece of elastic in the navy fabric and coverstitched it to make a strap. I then cut it into 2 pieces and arranged them across the back and stitched in place.

I’m not done with the swimsuit making. Emma still wants me to make her something. I also have ideas for a tankini/swim-dress for myself and a retro styled tank with a more shaped bust. I also ordered the Jalie racer-back tank pattern yesterday and that should give me something to work with for basic suits too. Now that I’m fairly confident in the basic steps I’d like to find patterns to incorporate more advanced details like shaped bra cups and under-wires. I don’t really need under-wires but I’ve been asked by a more “endowed” friend to make her a suit and she has a RTW suit I could copy with under-wires. I’d like a suit with more bust detailing just to give myself the illusion of more going on there if you know what I mean. I have some ideas, just need to find the time to experiment and see what I can come up with.

I made a major score at Joann’s yesterday. I ran out of swimwear elastic and stopped there after work to get more. The bulk elastic was on clearance and was marked .25/yd. I took what was left to the cutting table and told them I’d take it all. The girl then told me it rang up for .10/yd! I got 18.5 yards of elastic for less than $2!!! SCORE!!!

I think there is a 6pm Aqua-Fit class at the gym tomorrow night. Might be a good reason to debut the new suit!

I promised yesterday to post about my next sewing obsession, sewing my own swimsuits. I recently had to take Emma shopping for a one piece swimsuit for “swim gym”. It is mid-January in Illinois, I thought we’d be Sh*t Outta Luck as they say. So I started turning the idea of making her a simple tank over in my mind. I did some research on Pattern Review and decided I could do this. I figured that if I did find her a suit that fit it would cost $100 for a size 0 suit that took all of a half yard of fabric to make and she’d never wear it again outside of PE. But she got lucky, we found one that worked on the clearance rack in the back of Dick’s Sporting Goods for $20. But now my mind wouldn’t rest. I ordered some cheap lycra spandex fabric online, ordered a Kwik Sew book from Amazon and continued my research. I spend a lot of money on suits since we put in our pool, usually from Lands End because they have cute suits that fit and flatter a middle age figure. I also used to take Aqua-fit classes at the gym and I liked a different type of suit for those. I’d been thinking I needed to get back to the gym for those again this winter and a new suit or two may just be the motivation I needed to jump back in.

So let me show you what I’ve added to may stash recently:

First of all I ordered this book. It has basic patterns in the back in a large range of sizes. The styling and fabric choices in the photos is dated to say the least, but the information is good and some of the patterns have a lot of potential. The only style really missing that I would like is a racer back tank. I don’t like halter top suits because of my neck issues and spaghetti straps always seem to slip off my shoulders. But I think if I need to I can use these patterns as a starting point and modify them to suit my needs.

This lovely Wonder Woman number is one of my favorites. Not that I’d ever make it but it is good for a laugh or two. In all honesty I do like the bra top style and may use it to modify one of the one-piece tanks to a more flattering style for myself.

The book gives really good instruction for making the bra top and I know that Emma prefers bikinis so I may use it for a suit for her too. She’s more of a Batman kind of girl than Wonder Woman though.

These are some of the fabrics that I purchased. The first set is a black with pink and purple dots and a solid black. I think these will be used for something for Emma. But there is enough black there for at least bottoms or a contrast for another suit. The second photo is a multi-stripe and solid navy. I ordered the stripe online and ordered the royal blue in the last photo to go with it. But the online photos didn’t depict the colors well and in person they don’t match at all. Plus the royal blue is very shiny, maybe I’ll put it aside until I find red stripes and make that Wonder Woman suit after all. The navy in the second picture is from Joann’s. I originally bought it with the idea of making a modified version of the Alison Suit from Burda Style. But when the blues didn’t match in the online purchased fabrics I changed my mind. I’m also on the lookout for a copy of Kwik Sew 2500. If I find it I will make it in purple to replace my favorite Lands End suit.

When will I get to all of this? I have no idea. But I did buy a yard of lycra lining fabric, swimwear elastic and a few types of bra cups at Joann’s last week too so I have everything I need when the mood strikes me. But for today I need to get back into my sewing room and work on yesterday’s list of priorities. I got quite a bit done on the Theater Aprons yesterday afternoon and evening, an hour or two more and they should be done. Then it is on to the Missoni fabric top for Saturday. If that goes together as fast as it should I might be able to start embroidering the dogs’ names on the denim for their beds.

You get a headless full-body photo this time because my photographer was in a hurry to get to Homecoming last night and her friends were about to arrive and she didn’t want to be seen taking photos of her Mom. She also deleted the pictures of herself and her friends from my SD card before I could transfer them to my computer. So I guess you’ll just have to hope you are cool enough to be her Facebook friend and can see them there. Emma went to a friend’s to get ready for the dance so I didn’t see her in her full ensemble and will have to rely on her friend’s mom to send me some eventually.

Anyway, I did get my Missoni knock off dress done. Like the shirt from this pattern, it took longer to trace the pattern and convert my serger to cover-stitch than it did to make the whole thing. Speaking of Missoni did you see this? Missoni for Target rain boots hit eBay for $31,000 Why do I have a feeling she is heavy into Beanie Babies too? Can’t knock a girl for trying though I guess.

<b>Pattern Description: </b>
Fitted pull-over dress and top have V-neckline and draped collar. Front extends forming collar and facing.
<b>Pattern Sizing:</b>
Large graded out to XL at hips.
<b>Did it look like the photo/drawing on the pattern envelope once you were done sewing with it?</b>
Yes
<b>Were the instructions easy to follow?</b>
Very easy.
<b>What did you particularly like or dislike about the pattern?</b>
I made this pattern before in the top version and loved it. I like the ease of construction most of all. It goes together fast and perfectly every time.
<b>Fabric Used:</b>
Polyester ITY in a Missoni inspired print. Purchased at Sew Generously, St. Charles, IL
Loved this fabric because thanks to Target Missoni is all the rage right now and I love that the busy-ness of the print hides my figure flaws. Plus it is super comfortable.
<b>Pattern alterations or any design changes you made:</b>
The only change I made was to grade out to the XL at the hips. With KS 1/4" seams I didn’t want to take the chance that it would be too tight across my stomach. I also lengthened it about 1.5" As you can see on the pattern envelope, it is designed to hit just above the knee. I didn’t think that would be the most flattering length on me and I didn’t want it too short to make it difficult to wear to work.
<b>Would you sew it again? Would you recommend it to others?</b>
Absolutely. I know for sure that this will be a TNT pattern for the top view and I’m really happy with the way the dress turned out so I’m sure it will get made again too.
<b>Conclusion: </b>
Easily one of my favorite dresses to wear right now. I wore it last night to usher at the theater and to a cast party afterward. I got compliments on it and it was comfortable to wear all night. I’m thinking that I will pair it with my black boots for winter.